my fairy tale life.

i really believe i am the luckiest woman in the whole wide world. here's why:

i am HAPPY. that's a pretty huge deal these days. compared to people around me, and the American public at large. but not only that - it's a huge deal for me. i have struggled my entire life to be really, truly happy. i've thrown myself in headfirst to things that i imagined would bring me happiness, only to be desperately disappointed.

but here i am, 25 years into it, and i've found happiness. i have a loving, wonderful husband who delights in me and is proud to let me delight in him. all morning he has been singing songs, inserting his nickname for me into them. he lights up when i do the same thing. our lives are one life now, and neither of us have any regrets. we have the same purpose, the same goals, and the same dreams. our marriage is drenched in love love love.

i have a community of other Jesus followers that i live life with. my house church is full of other Christians who have different perspectives and personalities, and i wouldn't know what to do without them. we meet together and struggle through life and philosophy, but best of all, we love each other. despite our flaws. we worship together, pray together, learn together, eat together, work together, and serve together. it's a beautiful example of the church.

and outside my house church, i have other friends who mean the world to me. sarah, who has been a faithful devoted friend since we were freshman in high school. tara, who i love to love, despite our differences. my life would not be complete without these girls. they are an essential part of my happiness and my sanity.

and my family is incredible. i have the coolest people of all time in my family. my mother is a passionate, loving woman who only wants to be good and right. she is one of the bravest people i've ever met. my brother jordan was born with a heart overflowing with love and compassion. plus, he's interested in everything. and one of the smartest people ever. top two, with my sister hannah. i'm not sure who's smarter. but hannah knows EVERYTHING, and she is so unique and beautiful. and my baby sister bonnie belle has the gift of friendship. she has more friends than anyone in the whole world, and all of them consider her their best friend. she has this uncanny and precocious ability as an 18 year old to see the world past her own nose. i'm sure that's why so many people love her. she is wise beyond her years and compassionate beyond her years. and my grandparents are just these amazing, God-fearing people who live their lives to please him and love people. my pawpaw was my favorite man in the whole entire world until i met my husband. and i have these great, interesting cousins and uncles and aunts, too.

and i love my in-laws. how about that, huh? they loved me immediately, the second they met me. i never have had to prove anything to them, except that i love their son. which had to be obvious. lisa is the sweetest woman, and bruce is a hilarious man who is devoted to his family. my new sisters-in-law are wonderful, and wow, just the whole family is great.

i guess what i've found is the key to my happiness is to surround myself with people who are full of love that spills out of them, and to lavish them with love as well. just to love and be loved in return, like in moulin rouge.


the kingdom of heaven is at hand.

does your view of heaven affect the way you live your life?

this is the main point we discussed tonight at house church. and i was inspired to document my answer, because what i said out loud tonight was sadly inarticulate.

but i'm so inspired by the idea of heaven! not like some distant place in the sky with streets of gold and mansions and pearly gates, but the dominion of God that is at hand.

God, in his nature, is totally good, completely pure and holy. he IS love. so his dominion? no tears! no mourning! no crying! no pain! no death! (see the end of revelation for a complete description). God's kingdom is all about redeeming what's lost, healing what's broken, and making all things new. THIS is what heaven is.

and heaven lives in us, who are followers of Christ. he is making us into new creations. he has placed heaven, the kingdom of God, in our hearts. we are living it. now. he is making US new. he is redeeming US. he is healing US. and as his followers, he calls us to usher in his kingdom. to make disciples of all nations. our job is to bring his light to the dark places. everyday, says my friend j.b., we offer people heaven or hell with how we choose to treat them.

how amazing that we get to participate in the coming of the kingdom of heaven! how amazing that every day i get to witness heaven coming in my own life as i become more like Jesus. how amazing that i get to see God bringing heaven into my friends, like h.m. who is conquering addiction after addiction and being healed from her brokenness. how beautiful to see God's children offering heaven to the world as we clothe the naked, feed the hungry, care for the sick and the imprisoned, and love the unlovely. how exciting to imagine what it will look like when this is all fulfilled. when ALL things are heaven.

heaven starts here. heaven is coming NOW. be a part of it! embrace the journey instead of waiting until it's over.


i don't know why i created this blog.

but i did. so i will write.

i'm sick, and bored. [oh, THAT'S why i created this blog]. i've been watching too much tv. know what i've noticed? practically every commercial makes men look like complete idiots. is this where feminism has brought us? seriously, just pay attention. there is a plethora of media advertising with women exasperated with their bozo husbands.

i am a feminist, though. but i like men. there are very few men in my life who are actually idiots. i like having them around. and my husband is a gem. i just happen to believe that i am equally as intelligent.

why do people want to buy things marketed by stupid men and their bitchy wives?